Way Back Machine

The way back machine is this awesome website that lets you look at some of your favorite websites as they were way back in the day. You can watch how they evolved into what they are now and even look at some now defunct sites that you used to really love. My favorite thing is to go back and look at AOL since for some reason I'm very obsessed with AOL. Maybe because I spent so much time with it back in the early 2000s. I'm so obsessed with it I watch their old commercials!

Indeed old man, what will they think of next? The lady in the still shot used as the cover (or whatever it's called. I ain't no YouTube wizard!) has some awesome crunchy hair. 

Speaking of awesome videos I watch on YouTube, here are a series of commercials that AT&T did in the early 1990's to tell you about things we will be able to do in the future that they could already do but wouldn't give to us for 15 more years!!! Coincidence or conspiracy? Also, is it just me or is Tom Sellack the one doing the ads? Jennifer would know this. She likes Magnum PI.

For those of you wanting to check out the way back machine, here is the link. 

Romeo + Juliet

Guys, I have a confession. No matter how womanizing he is or how he'll only date models who are about 25 (meaning I was right in knowing he would date someone my age!) I will always be in love with Leonardo DiCaprio. It's a sickness. A disease. And I don't want a cure.

Baz Luhrmann's Romeo+Juliet came out in 1996, and I was only 12 years old. Does not matter. I was in love. I had read the book in school (I was advanced in those days. "Gifted" as they called it. Oh if they could see me now...) and I sort of thought it was crazy for 14 year olds to be getting married and killing themselves over it. At the tender age of 12 I knew I was not going to be doing any of that in two years time. But then I saw this movie and I knew why they were doing it. That scene, at the party, with the fish tank. Come on. Everyone could see it. Leo's face just shows you how he was falling in love with her. 

See that love? That's a love that won't quit (until they, you know, die). Lately, Leo D has been looking hot again. He allowed himself to be played by Blake Lively and now he's back on his A game, hooking up with more models and not so puffy in the face and Oh My God he just filmed The Great Gatsby!!! Seriously folks, my Leo love has come back hardcore. If it stays like this I might lift my ban on seeing the rerelease of Titanic because I have to see Leo. Maybe this is what he wants. He probably gets a piece of the profits from the film and he needs people like me to remember why we love him. I didn't want to see it because it's just greedy ass James Cameron wanting more money (we don't need to see the ship sink in 3d, and if offered to me, I will not be seeing this film in 3d). Leo, is this what you're doing too? Are you trying to suck money out of me because you want it too? James Cameron sucks on about 10 different levels even if he did make some of my favorite movies (meaning Aliens I can thankfully say to this day I haven't seen that stupid Avatar nonsense. I've already seen Fern Gully. It had Christian Slater and Robin Williams AND they sang!). 

Anyway, Leo hasn't been this hot since The Departed. Do you remember the sex scene with him and the doctor?

 

I hope I haven't completely made your day useless with Leo reminiscing.  

Hunger Games

I'm sure by now you've either read The Hunger Games or at least seen the movie preview. If all you've seen in the preview, I suggest you go read the book, because it's pretty awesome and will only take you a few hours. Then you'll want to read the other two. I'm not wanting to talk about the books as in  "here is what I think of them" more I want to discuss Katniss and if I think she makes very sound decisions. So I guess if you've never read them don't read this, or if you have no intentions of reading them and/or don't care to know what happens, continue onward. I'm making a jump for those who do care.

Gel Pens

Oh gel pens. In order to be cool at my middle school, you had to have them. Every year during the annual back to school trip to buy notebooks and such, it was essential to also buy gel pens. Usually though, if you didn't go early enough, they were sold out. Yes reader, there was a pen so popular that it would sell out.

who wouldn't want these?

Now there were a few different kinds of gel pens. There were the regular, metallic and glitter. The glitter were shit because it was actual chunks of glitter that would make it hard to write, but in order to show you were really awesome you had to have metallic. Ironically they were also about a dollar more on a set of pens that were already pretty pricey at $6. 

I'm not gonna lie to you reader, my family was poor. We couldn't really afford to buy gel pens all the time so when I received money I would save it so I could buy them. They became so popular that teachers had to start saying we couldn't turn in assignments written with gel pens, which was fine by us, the real magic was in note writing. 

Oh yes, the lost art of note writing. We would line our gel pens up on our desks and write our bff (phonetically pronounced) all about what was going on in that long, lonely period where we were away from one another. If we were really ambitious that day we would write every word in a new color, but usually each paragraph was a new color. It takes me days on end and a little bit of team work to be able to write a paper but I was able to write two pages to my friends who I had just seen about an hour ago about everything that was happening with me. That takes some dedication, I tells ya. 

I was recently at Target and looked for some gel pens and didn't see them on the shelf. I hope that means they are simply sold out and the allure of the gel pen lives on. If not, I will be very sad to know that they are only sold at specialty shops (yes, I consider Staples to be special) because that means they know that only old people like me are going to buy them, because what 11 year old asks their mom to go to Staples?

Marilyn Monroe

*Technical note: I had some internet issues but after telling AT&T that they can either fix my shit or give me my money back they fixed my shit. Everything should be going well now. Hopefully. Because I do have school work to do. Anyway, back to good stuff...

I don't like Marilyn Monroe. This will probably alienate some of you but I believe I'm going to make a great argument for it. First of all, she was not a good actress. Some Like it Hot was good because of Tony Curtis and in spite of her being in it. Gentlemen Prefer Blondes was just a great production. This also brings me to my next point, which is her little girl baby voice. Apparently she never got past the age of ten because her voice is even more high pitched and girlie annoying than my six year old nieces. Her singing voice was as good as any actresses in a movie, although Baz Lurhman's version of "Diamonds are a Girls Best Friend" with Nicole Kidman was better, but that has other contributing factors. Anway...

She was stupid. Every year (for reasons that are baffling to me and make me angry), Vanity Fair publishes passages from her "secret" diaries. And every time there are really really really simple words misspelled. This girl could probably barely spell her own name. She was sad, depressed and lonely. And while I feel bad for here there are millions of people who suffer this same thing everyday and they're aren't hailed as some champions of society. Also, newflash, she wasn't a size 12- she was actually a size 6 or 8, and by Hollywood standards nowadays she might as well been a size 26 but for when she was famous, being a 6 was actually the norm. They weren't all anorexic yet, the only people who were really like that were models. It wasn't until the 1990's when the modeling world and the acting world blended that it became imperative for women in Hollywood to be very very skinny. She had a very nice body, but it wasn't a "bigger" body and she just defied the laws of stardom and became famous anyway. She actually looked like many of the other actresses at the time. I don't really know where these rumors came from, but people need to stop believing them.

She was a slut. She really really was. I don't care if the President was the only one she was sleeping around with. It doesn't matter. It's not like he was some random off the street and she didn't know he was married. She knew, she didn't care, and she slept around with him anyway. Everyone already knows the Kennedy's are pretty sleezy, but somehow she gets to be cool and viewed as this awesome person who was just giving the man what his prude wife wouldn't. If this is something you believe, congratulations, you will probably sleep with a married man or woman and justify it by saying if they were happy they wouldn't be sleeping around.

She was not a figure of feminism. She wasn't trying to help the cause for women. She wasn't making any statements about body image or confidence or trying to be your own person. She was like a high schooler the way she fell in love. She was very insecure and relied off of the compliments of others to make her feel good and she wanted nothing more than to lead a normal life and be a housewife. Instead she was so sad and drug addicted that she killed herself. Which is sad. But nothing to be worshipped.